In life, we are always somewhere in the cycle of change. And we need to allow ourselves to be in whatever phase we are at any given moment, before we will be able to transition into the next one. This past weekend I attended the second live module of my life coaching course with iPEC. Again, a very powerful and positive three days. And at some point I was introduced to the metaphor of a card game to illustrate this cycle of life idea. It turns out we are always in one of four areas:
- Almost like a â€˜time-out phaseâ€™ to reflect and research, or perhaps emotionally heal. Itâ€™s a period where we detach from what may not be working in life.
- During this phase we work through the feelings involved in the ending of the last life cycle, which then allows for a new beginning and new possibilities.
- It may include fear of the unknown, have ups and downs, but by the end of the cycle we are enthusiastic about a new game to play.
- A time of action â€“ experimenting, training and networking â€“ we are putting into play the ideas and plan we may have created in the shuffle.
- During this phase we develop confidence, begin to look at life as an opportunity, and are ready to explore, stretch, and make things happen.
- It may include fear of failure or success, the desire to take it one step at a time, but high energy and enthusiasm is likely.
Â The playing of the game:
- Now weâ€™re really in it! This phase is mostly positive, as we are living our dreams and reach a state of well-being.
- During this phase we begin to feel a sense of success, and itâ€™s a time to really live in the moment.
- It may include some self-doubt or self-sabotage, but also likely is a sense of fulfillment, peace, and purpose.
The Toss In:
- Inevitably, everything in life at some point will come to an end. It may end with â€˜successâ€™ or â€˜failureâ€™, but something is going to change.
- During this phase there may be some resistance or a possible lack of hope, or include a period of â€˜hibernationâ€™ of sorts.
- It may include feelings of loss, fear of the unknown, isolation… but it is creating the space for a new adventure.
Depending on where we may be in this cycle of change, we are going to be thinking certain things, feeling certain things, and either getting ready to, resisting, or wanting to take action. And wherever we are, whatever we may be experiencing, is perfectly normal. As Iâ€™ve said before, wherever we are, we are exactly where we need to be.
Iâ€™ll admit Iâ€™m ready to make things happen in my life — to launch my business (more on that next week!), to get somewhere, to be someone — like NOW. And whatâ€™s ironic, is that my thinking is, the faster Iâ€™m there, the faster I will be able to really start living my life. When in fact, the opposite more often occurs. Trying to rush through the phase I am in now in order to get to the next one is exactly what is preventing me from living and enjoying the present moment.
And so it is, especially true when going through transition. I have just tossed in my life in Wales, and am trying to â€˜shuffleâ€™ on through the shuffle phase, instead of honouring the importance of really experiencing this phase. I hope to be in action soon enough… so now is a time to reflect, to perhaps experience the out with the old and make space for the new. Itâ€™s exciting! And although I am eager to start playing a new game, I canâ€™t start dealing or playing before I have properly shuffled.
Let’s ensure we take whatever time we need to really be where we are, and live in the moment. Because that is where life takes place. Right here, wherever â€˜hereâ€™ is, ready to play.
Have a FAB week everyone!
What are your thoughts on the cycle of life? What are you experiencing right now? Iâ€™d love to hear from you in the comments below.