Brave Leadership

Why your FEAR ZONE is actually a good place to be…

July 17, 2020 by Carol Schulte 6 Comments

Happy Friday!

So it turns out I had it wrong all along!

Well, sort of.

See, I used to think there were only three zones of human experience… and it turns out there are actually four.

And when it comes to fear, I’m being reminded that perhaps it’s not such a bad thing after all. In fact, it’s actually a GOOD THING – especially if you’re ready to learn, stretch and grow.

I would even go so far as to say you need to both embrace your fear and invite it in!

In this week’s video, I’ll share a new model with you so you’ll understand exactly what I mean. If you’re ready to push past your fear, you gotta watch it now!

So, are you ready to get out of your familiar zone, get your brave on, and step into your fear? After all, that is the only way you’ll get to the place of learning and then growth.

You are ready NOW!

I look forward to hearing from you in the comments below…

Have a FAB week,

Never save anything for the swim back…

July 10, 2020 by Carol Schulte 2 Comments

Yesterday morning I jumped in the lake for a quick dip, and then decided I’d go for an actual swim. (I’m up north at a cottage right now – soaking in my fave way to enjoy the Canadian summer – feeling pretty grateful!)

At first, I told myself I’d do 100 strokes in each direction. And as I was approaching the last stoke, I thought, why not just keep going? A little over 500m up ahead was a floating dock, with a bright yellow slide. So that became my new goal, my new target.

It reminded me of a powerful scene from the movie Gattaca, where two brothers – one who had been genetically modified before birth and physically ‘superior’ – replayed a ritual they used to do when they were younger. They would run into the ocean, and start swimming… to see who could go the furthest and outswim the other. And it was always Vincent, the genetically ‘inferior’ brother, who tested far less strong and able, who would win every time.

Once again, his brother Anton could no longer keep up and yelled ahead to Vincent to turn back. Struggling to get his words out amidst the crashing waves, he asked him how he did it. How he managed to do any of it – any of all he had achieved in his life… far surpassing anything that was ever expected of him.

“You want to know how I did it?” Vincent yelled back. “This is how I did it, Anton.
I never saved anything for the swim back.”

It was a powerful moment. (And watching this scene is far more powerful than I’m expressing here, believe me! In fact, the movie is worth the watch…)

And it’s a powerful idea.

Never save anything for the way back.

To me, this idea is all about giving it your all, going full out, and not worrying if you’re going to get there, how you’re going to get there, and what you’ll have left at the end of it.

It could also be interpreted as a warning not to jump ahead to what doesn’t even exist yet. As sometimes it’s the fear of what could be or the anxiety of what doesn’t yet exist, that prevents people from taking the first step – or stroke – at all.

And yet there’s no point spending energy in a future that does not yet exist!

It’s really about committing to the journey, taking it one step at a time, being willing to take the risk, and trusting you will figure it all out as you go.

There have been numerous times where I have tip-toed – dipped in with only one foot – instead of diving in headfirst. And you know what? I never get where I want to go, nor do I receive the results I was hoping for.

I’ve come to realize it’s a form of self-sabotage. And it never serves me!

The truth is, whenever we’re trying something new, or embarking on a new project or goal of any sort, we’re never going to know exactly what it’s going to look like before we do it.

And moreover, we’re never going to know how we’re going to get there, and what we’re going to come up against in the process.

We’re not guaranteed to make it. We’re not guaranteed to succeed. We’re not guaranteed that it will look or feel as we’d hoped or envisioned it to be.

And yet, nothing is guaranteed in life.

If this global pandemic has taught me anything, it’s that life as we know it can change in a heartbeat. Life can be messy. And life is about living in the moment and doing our best to make the most of every moment.

Those were some of my thoughts during my swim this morning!

And here are some of my thoughts to hopefully inspire you this week:

Take a risk and play all out
Embrace (and enjoy!) the journey
Don’t save anything for the way back

Don’t be held back because you don’t know what every step of the process will look like.

Don’t worry about whether you will get there, how you will get there, or what it will look like when you do.

And don’t allow fear of an outcome or a potential future that doesn’t yet exist hold you back!

I dare you to get your brave on this week and go for a “swim”… and not save anything for the way back.

(Let me know what you’re going to take on this week in the comments below, so I can cheer you on!)

Is it time to pop a little bubbly (or a fizzy soda?!?)

July 3, 2020 by Carol Schulte Leave a Comment

Happy Friday!

Do you love yourself a good celebration?!?

I know I do!

And being on the heels of Canada 🇨🇦 Day, and on the eve of the 4th of July, it got me thinking about celebration.

I’m all about the excitement and the cheers and the pomp and circumstance… I’m that girl who brings balloons for every birthday no matter what age, always has sparklers at the ready, and literally a party and celebration storage box with crowns and noise makers and confetti to boot. You just never know when you’re going to need them!

While important days like our countries’ or our friends’ birthdays, or other exciting events like weddings and anniversaries are ripe for proper celebration, you don’t always need a special occasion in order to find a reason to celebrate.

In fact, if you wait only for said special day for a celebration, you’re going to be missing out on a whole lotta moments worth celebrating!

In my book (which I embarrassingly started writing YEARS ago! And one of these days will come out… mark my words!) one of the chapters is titled “It’s Tuesday! Time to break out the China!” And it’s all about the need to find moments and reasons to celebrate as much and as often as possible.

I see it all the time – with women especially – accomplishing big things, reaching their goals, getting their brave on a BIG way… and as soon as they do, they’re already looking ahead to the next thing!

Umm… hold on! You gotta take at least a moment or two to acknowledge how far you’ve come, recognize your progress, and celebrate your wins!

And every small step counts.

All too often we’re looking ahead to where we want to go next – what next milestone we want to hit, what next goal we want to crush, what next mountain we want to climb.

And, because we will never get ‘there’ (there will always be another milestone, goal, or mountain…) you really do need to take some time to acknowledge where you are right here, right now.

When was the last time you took the time to properly celebrate 🎉 something you’ve achieved, or a special moment in time?

One of the things I have the highly ambitious females I work with do, is to write out a celebrations list.

I have them sit in their fave coffee shop or cozy chair, beverage of choice in hand, and relaxing or inspiring music in the background (I often recommend epic soundtrack music… it really helps set the tone!) And ask them to set a timer for 15 minutes. Fifteen minutes to write out all you have accomplished, achieved, experienced. And I bet you’d be pretty darn impressed with yourself!

Just like bravery and love and laughter, celebration is contagious.

“The more you praise and celebrate your life, the more there is in life to celebrate.” ~ Oprah

We’re in a bit of a weird time. And we may not be able to celebrate in the way we’re used to.

Canada Day this year just wasn’t quite the same. (I’m ashamed to say I didn’t even wear my special red maple leaf t-shirt, which I keep especially for this day!) But I still took a moment to celebrate and reflect on how grateful I am to be Canadian. I had a picnic in one of the beautiful parks we have in the city. And I watched the CN Tower light show, and managed to catch some unexpected and very much appreciated fireworks from my balcony.

And, you don’t need fireworks to celebrate!

So, I have two small challenges for you this week.

Find something in your life, TODAY, to celebrate.
Choose how you are going to celebrate! Are you going to take a moment on your own, take a bubble bath, reflect in your journal, pop some bubbly, listen to your favourite song, order a double scoop of ice cream, eat some rich chocolate, sleep in?

Take a moment to acknowledge where you are, how far you’ve come, and all that lies ahead. Take a moment to truly celebrate this moment.

I DARE you.

Have a FAB week!

Would you be willing to take this leap? She was…

June 27, 2020 by Carol Schulte 2 Comments

I’m going to go out on a limb here, and bet you have no idea what you are truly capable of.

I’ve seen it so many times before, and experienced it again so profoundly this week.

For the first time since Covid-19 hit, I was lucky enough to get back to doing what I love, leading a small group of females on a leadership retreat (and in beautiful Kelowna to boot! First time traveling in over 3 months – and I have to say it felt good…)

And it never ceases to amaze me… seeing such extremely accomplished women not seeing in themselves what others – or what I – see in them.

It was during one of our experiential activities this week – braving the ropes course and zip lines – this pattern showed up again.

A few of them were admittedly pretty apprehensive. Either never having attempted a high ropes course before, or because heights was simply not their thing. Some were pretty fearful, reluctant to even put on a harness.

Sometimes we need someone else to remind us of how capable we are, how amazing we are.
And sometimes we need an opportunity or an invitation to step into a bigger version of ourselves.

Here was an opportunity, and an invitation.

Try on the harness. Tighten the straps. Go through ground school. Practice letting go and being caught by your harness. Walk up to the first element. Connect to the belaying system. Take the first step up the ladder. Walk onto the platform. Attach yourself to the line.

There was some emotion that arose, and there were some tears.

And you know what?

Two brave ladies in particular – who were initially the most anxious, and also quite emotional – were two of the only ones who made it to the third and most challenging level of the entire course!

The truth is, all too often when you are facing something you’ve never done before, something that scares you, or something you’re not sure you can do – we let those feelings and fears get in our way of ever taking the first step.

Sometimes (in fact more than sometimes) I bet you underestimate yourself.

Sometimes (in fact more than sometimes) I bet you haven’t felt ready or able to do the thing.

And sometimes (in fact more than sometimes) I bet you’ve felt pretty darn amazing when you’ve pushed through the fear and done it anyway.

You wouldn’t be human otherwise.

What sets those apart from being able to go further, to grow further, to push beyond their comfort zone and reach new heights, are those willing to be brave enough to take action in spite of their fear.

You may never feel ready before you try something for the first time.

And yet the irony is, you’ll feel ready only after you’ve done the thing!

/BRĀV/:

Your willingness to get into action long before you feel ready, because you are choosing to feel ready enough.

Whenever you do anything new, it’s going to feel uncomfortable.

And whenever you do anything that stretches you, that pushes you, that scares you… it’s going to feel uncomfortable. There’s no other way around it.

And that is how you learn, you grow, and you achieve what you never thought possible.

Comfort and growth cannot co-exist.
And yet growth is required for real fulfilment.

The two ladies who were the most anxious going into the ropes course challenge, and chose to try it, to push through their fears, to keep going – were the ones who came out of the experience with the biggest smiles and the richest experience!

Now I’ll admit I make a pretty good cheerleader (and so if you’re looking for one, just say the word and I’ll be there with my pom poms in a heartbeat!) But you make an even better cheerleader for yourself. And I know she’s in there!

What have you been reluctant to try in your life? Perhaps it’s time to put on your harness, to face your first element, to take the first step up the ladder.

I dare you.

And then please share with me what you’re going to take on in the comments below – and I shall get my pom poms ready!

Have a FAB week!

Confession time. I am racist. The good news? I can change that.

June 12, 2020 by Carol Schulte Leave a Comment

Happy Friday.

“We are not a trend. It’s more than that. A hashtag or a post. This is our lives… brave conversations need to happen. Awkward conversations…between Black people and wh… no – white people. They need to listen. And makes changes.”

Powerful words from my interview and ‘Brave Conversation’ with Chantal Carter last week.

My heart is still heavy.

While my hope is these Happy Friday blogs offer rays of positivity, helpful insights, ideas that inspire you into action (even before you ready… as that is what brave is all about!), I also value authenticity above all else.

I can no longer ignore our broken system, the systemic racism that continues to be pervasive – even in 2020 – and the social injustice that is killing lives. Black lives matter.

Perhaps you, too, have been deep into the conversation this past week.

So I don’t want, or need, to oversaturate you today.

Nor is it my voice that need’s to be heard right now.

And, I will share this:

After listening to a very eye-opening podcast episode Bréne Brown and Ibram X. Kendi on How To Be an Antiracist I was forced face the friction I’ve been feeling and experiencing.

The opposite of being racist is not ‘not being a racist.’ It’s being anti-racist.

And so therefore (stay with me), in my denial of racism, I am racist. But in the continual confession and acknowledgement of my racism, and committing to do the work to change, I am pursuing anti-racism.

This is GOOD NEWS. None of us are inherently racist. We have the power to change that. But it takes never-ending work.

“The heartbeat of racism is denial; confession is the heartbeat of antiracism.”

~ Ibram X. Kendi

Anti-racist work is hard.

I’ve heard that from numerous people – black people, white people, people who have been doing the work for years, people who have been avoiding the work, people who are ready to do the work.

I don’t know what that looks like entirely for me and The Brave Institute yet, and, I’m engaging in the conversation. I’m committing to figuring it out. And while I can err on the side of spontaneity, or taking action without fully thinking things through, this is too important to simply react in the moment.

I need to be in it for the long game.

As Chantal shared, “We are not a trend. It’s more than that… This is our lives…” (Watch the recording HERE.)

And in the meantime, The Brave Institute is continuing our ‘Brave Conversations’ series, and I’m grateful and excited to be speaking with Lily Cooper today at 1pm EST.

White ally, advocate, architect, writer, creator of Anti-Racism and Allyship Series, (not to mention all-around amazing human and friend) we’re going to dive deep on the idea of racial discomfort, the intersection of perfectionism and racism, and what action white people can take who are ready to ‘do the work.’

Please join us. (Even if you can’t join live, still register as you will receive the recording!)

Decades of social injustice cannot be undone in a few weeks.

And we – (I’ll admit I’ve used ‘we’ in the wrong context numerous, especially lately. Indeed I’m making mistakes and learning in the process! And in this case it is intentional…) the collective ‘we’ – (while in my opinion it’s time for white people to truly step up) need to be in it for the long game if we’re serious about ending racism.

I invite you to call me out, or call me in.

I invite you to hold me accountable.

I invite you to join me.

I hope you get your brave on this week,

How to Be Brave Beyond COVID-19!

May 28, 2020 by Carol Schulte Leave a Comment

Happy Friday!

Slowly stores are opening back up, parks are becoming packed with people, and we’re beginning to see signs of life again… finally!

And boy am I ready. Perhaps you are, too?!?

These have certainly been interesting and challenging times… I’ve certainly experienced my own ups and downs – and I know I’m not alone.

And while I have no idea what the new ‘normal’ will be (I do know, however, it won’t be the same ‘normal’ as before…) we do have a say in what our life could look like.

More specifically, when it comes to what we’ve enjoyed.

Is it working remotely?
The slower pace of life?
Dinner with the family every night?

As we begin to look beyond COVID-19, it’s up to you to start thinking about, and creating, what you want your ideal new normal to be.

And that may require you to be brave!

In this week’s video, I share 5 ways you can more bravely face this post-pandemic world… because although a lot may be out of your control, there is also a lot within your control.

Herein begs the question… what do you want to take with you as we move beyond COVID-19?

I hope you take a moment to recognize and celebrate the gifts that have come out of this time and be brave enough to keep some of those gifts in your life.

Because YOU get to choose.

So, which idea are you going to take on?

I challenge you to get your brāv on… and I want to hear from you in the comments below!