Carol Schulte

Get Your Brave On!

Learning BIG

The power of spontaneity.

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Photo by Alejandro Alvarez on Unsplash

As much as I try to deny it, I tend to sway closer to last minute planner than I do uber organised advanced planner. I wonder if I’ll ever change! 

However, I could look at it as being a bad thing, or I could simply reframe, and choose to say I enjoy being SPONTANEOUS.

And I do! 

And actually, there is power in spontaneity. 

Don’t get me wrong… it’s nice to have plans. To have something to look forward to, something to work toward. (And if you’re a Mom, running a household, or have certain responsibilities at work, you kinda HAVE to be on top of your planning game!)

At the same time, natural planner or not, sometimes it’s okay – and necessary – to be able and wiling to throw your plans to the wayside.

As great as plans may be, they don’t always happen ‘as planned‘. Sometimes plans change. Sometimes plans fall through. 

Back in the day when I was young and innocent, (of course I’m still both, let’s be honest!) I had big plans for my life. I thought I’d be married at 21 and have 8 kids by now. I’m not even kidding! I also thought I would be living on a farm and have a veterinarian clinic across the street. HA!

Alas, someone had other plans for my life… (funny as the weekly quote on my wall reads “We must be willing to let go of the life we planned so as to have the life that is waiting for us.” ~ Joseph Campbell)

So while it’s good to have plans, sometimes it’s equally as important, and powerful, to allow yourself to be spontaneous. To go with the flow.

To say yes to something that scares you, to say yes to something that appeared totally out of the blue, to say yes to something you never in a million years could have imagined for yourself or your life.

Looking back, some of the moments I’ve been most spontaneous in my life have also brought me the most joy, the best adventures, the biggest growth. 

For example…

Being spontaneous had me applying to Remote Year while in the same conversation I was first learning about it. I mean, within minutes. 

Being spontaneous led me to resigning from a good job in Toronto over email to accept a job offer while traveling in Australia… only to meet an amazing man and move into his van and go apple picking in New Zealand a few days later.

Being spontaneous meant some pretty cool work opportunities locally and beyond ~ from serving tables in fancy bars and restaurants (even facilitated an engagement!) , to playing a bartender in Space on TV (because why not?!?), to working in ski rentals (ie dancing on the ski and board adjustment tables and having the time of my life in Queenstown), to working at Club Med Crested Butte in the Kids Club, (I was visiting my best friend who was working there… and had an offer, a visa, and a return plane ticket within a week!) to selling yoga apparel and soon managing people (I was simply looking for a fun job just after my Mum passed… and to this day credit lululemon with the start of both my personal and professional development journey), to teaching French to kindergarten kids at a Russian school (boy did I learn a lot!), to working as a Communications Instructor at The University of Illinois while completing my Masters degree (will forever be grateful to my Springfield and Communications Department family!), to creating a yoga community in Wrexham, Wales… and I could go on!

Being spontaneous meant saying yes to a dare to go bungee jumping in Greece (if you wanna hear this crazy story, I’ll actually be sharing it from the stage at MoMondays Toronto in a few days!)

Being spontaneous led me to meeting some pretty amazing people all over the world, hearing some pretty inspiring stories, and experiencing some pretty amazing cultural experiences… like living in Ashrams and riding on camels and throwing both buckets of water and dump trucks of tomatoes all over thousands of strangers.

Being spontaneous has led me to numerous random events on random occasions, not knowing anyone, where I would end of meeting some of my now closest friends and entrepreneurial sisters… Oh, and my partners for our upcoming program and trip to Tanzania!

So although structure and planning is certainly an ‘area of opportunity’ for me, I will also say my ability to be spontaneous has led to some pretty amazing events and happenings and current joy in my life. 

Okay enough about me!

Wanna be more spontaneous and not sure where to start? 

 

 

1. Say ‘YES’ to something you would normally say ‘NO’ to.

 

And vice versa. Saying ‘NO’ to something you would have normally said ‘NO’ to may be equally as powerful. Dare to throw your norm out the window!

 

2. Quiet down, or better yet, turn OFF the ‘SHOULDS’ in your head.

One of my friends and colleagues runs an extremely successful pole dancing for fitness studio, and all because she ignored the voice that said ‘But good mamas don’t do pole!’ When she was first invited to attend a class. There is no one way you SHOULD be… as a Mom, a professional, or as any part of you for that matter.

3. Ask yourself honestly, ‘What’s the worst that can happen?’

Sometimes we jump to conclusions or make assumptions or run down the rabbit hole of worse case scenarios WAY too quickly, or way too unrealistically. Take a moment to explore all possibilities, and then trust. You regret the things your DON’T DO way more than the things you DO do. 

AND, if you’re TRULY ready to be spontaneous, SAY YES to coming to our   ‘TAKE THE LEAP!’ event happening tomorrow at iFLY Toronto! Women Living Big is turning 3 ~ and without giving too much away, I’m just about to go and pick up the rose gold balloons!

YES, there will be a little bubbly… (of all sorts…), and YES we’re also going Indoor Skydiving!

And, if you’re not ready to physically take the leap (at least not yet!) you can still come to the IGNITE! Workshop portion of the event, and learn how to get OUT of your comfort zone and into your ‘B.I.G. Zone!’ 

(As a loyal Happy Friday reader and member of our community, I have a special offer… you’ll come as my guest for less than 50% … because EVERYONE loves a celebration, right?!? Use Promo Code HAPPYFRIDAY!)

Even if you’re not able to come out tomorrow, I would still LOVE to hear of you doing something a little spontaneous this weekend. What do you have to lose?!?

Test out a new restaurant or sample a new flavour of ice cream.
Get into the spirit of Halloween and buy yourself a crazy costume.
Try out a new activity or hobby (I hear crocheting is pretty amazing for the mind!)

And then TELL me all about it in the comments below. 

Have a FAB week!

 

 

 

 

P.S. I’ve had fun interviewing some of the members of the WLB Members of our community on what it means to ‘Take The Leap!’ Check out my interview with Jill Valentine, founder of UGO Travel for Change HERE, and Ashley-Ann Pereira, author, speaker, creator of The Key To Happiness HERE.

The tale of the wallet with the silver lining.

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…Because there is always a silver lining. 

The night before last, in a sheer moment of panic, I realised my wallet was gone.

It had been taken from my bag while crossing a busy street in Toronto.

Seriously?!? Again?!?  (After all, I had my entire backpack taken not too long ago while on an overnight train in Croatia…)

Well, I went through the whole gamut of emotions… denial, anger, utter frustration, sadness, guilt… not to mention violation. And I played the ‘what if’ and ‘if only’ games WAY too many times. Hindsight will always be 20/20.

There were a lot of tears shed, let me tell you!

However after cancelling all of my cards, spending way too much of the day yesterday going to get a new driver’s license, health card, replacing my bank cards and trying to block all of my gift cards… I knew I had to get out of the ‘woe is me’ place.

We all go through shitty situations. And many are out of our control. But we can control how we react to them. And it’s an opportunity for us to step up, show up, and shift our perspective. 

It may not have been a very productive ‘work day,’  but it was a very productive ‘fill my soul’ day. 

I had some very heart-warming conversations with my special girlfriends and family members. I treated myself to getting my nails done. I sung Happy Birthday to a good friend whose birthday it was. I enjoyed a special moment with my stepmum, who unfortunately doesn’t have much time left. I went for a great run, which always brings clarity and inspiration and makes me feel better. I wrote a card and dropped off a plant for an old friend who is going through a very tough time. I watched my cousin’s son debut as a flying bat in his school production of Wizard of Oz. She and I shared a delicious Indian dinner afterwards. And then I went back to the police station I was at the night before, where I filed the report, to drop off some flowers for my new Aunt Jo (the lovely constable who totally calmed me down and had been so incredibly kind with me the night before…) She was clearly very moved. 

As I was driving home, I realised it was going to be okay (obviously!).  I was going to be okay. And in the grand scheme of things, it’s a wallet. Most of the cards can be replaced, it’s only money, and it could have been a lot worse. 

In my reflecting, I realised it’s important to do few things when a shitty thing happens.

Feel Big

Bad things are going to happen. It’s okay to be upset, to feel whatever it is you may be feeling. In fact, I would argue you gotta go through all of the emotions. You can’t skip steps. So don’t be afraid to feel what you’re feeling, before you are ready to shift your thinking. But don’t wallow too long. It’s also important to eventually come to a place of acceptance and be ready to move on. 

Connect Big 

I count my lucky stars every day to have the people in my life that I do. When you’re having a tough day, or facing a difficult situation, reach out to others. Seek support. You don’t have to face it alone. And, speaking to others will not only help shift your perspective – because we’re ALL going through something – it may also allow you to make new friends, or connect on a deeper level. Take it away from you for a moment, and be there for someone else who may need you. 

Appreciate Big

Appreciate all you have. Take it one step further than feeling gratitude, and get specific about what you appreciate. Reach out to people to let them know you appreciate them and why. Shift your perspective and think about how much worse it could be. Appreciate and be open to the learnings about what really matters.

 

So next time you find yourself in an unfortunate, unexpected, or uncontrollable situation, remember to feel big, connect big, and appreciate big. 

[ctt title=”Feel all the feelings. Connect with your peeps. Appreciate what you’ve got. And when you do, you’ll see the silver lining.” tweet=”Feel all the feelings. Connect with your peeps. Appreciate what you’ve got. And when you do, you’ll see the silver lining. #livingbig https://bit.ly/2JodbKy” coverup=”D09Rq”]

…Because there is always a silver lining.

And now I want to hear from YOU! What are you going to take on?

Have a FAB week!

Is it time to cheat on your job?

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Happy Friday!

This week I had the privilege of speaking in Ottawa as part of the Association of Public Sector Information Professionals (DPI) Professional Development Week.

I have to say they were an AWESOME group… engaged, present, and ready to play full out. And considering it was a beautiful sunny day, the fact they chose to stay indoors, and to learn and grow, tells me how dedicated they truly are to their work. 

It’s important to be dedicated to the work you do. 

It’s important to be engaged in the work you do. 

It’s important to care about the work you do.

(Although a scary stat ~ according to a Gallop study conducted last year, only 32% of the U.S. workforce were actively engaged in their work. EEK!)

That being said, it’s also important not to be too dedicated or care too care much about the work you do, that it ends up being ALL you do!

When was the last time, you had time, for a fun activity outside of work and personal obligations?

Well, it may just be about time!

It may be time to cheat on your work.

Now don’t get me wrong. I’m not encouraging you to cheat while on the job, get extra friendly with your co-workers, or look for something new. I’m merely suggesting it may be time you got something going on outside of work. 

Here are some ideas to do just that. 

1.   Reconnect, or connect, with your hobbies

Do you like to knit? Ever had a card, coin, or comic collection? Perhaps you get a kick out of bridge?

Perhaps it’s time to dig out those knitting needles, dust off those old comic books,  or plan an afternoon for tea and bridge! Or maybe you want to create a whole new hobby… 

When you’re making sure you make time for some of your personal interests outside of work, chances are you’ll be more engaged when you’re at work. 

2.   Learn a New Sport or Activity 

For the past few years, I’ve committed to learning a new sport every Summer. I’ve tried ultimate frisbee, golf, rowing… This year, I’m going to tri (spelled that way on purpose!) my hand at triathlons (pardon the pun!) and signed up for a newbie training skills day on Sunday. Wish me luck!

When we learn something new, we put ourselves out there, allow ourselves to get in that beginner mindset, and challenge ourselves mentally, physically, or both. And according to studies it also helps keep us young!

Perhaps you’ve always wanted to learn how to play guitar, how to speak Italian, or how to ride a unicycle. Maybe now is the time to make it happen!

3. Volunteer 

Volunteering can appear in many different ways. Maybe it means volunteering for the community bake sale, serving food at a soup kitchen, or sitting on a board. Maybe it means spending an afternoon picking up garbage at your local park, being there for a friend who needs you, or offering to mow your neighbour’s lawn. 

Whether you are sharing your time or your talents or a listening ear, when you give something of yourself to someone else, everybody wins. 

 

There you have it. Three easy ideas to start cheating on your work!

Now be careful here, and don’t jump too far in too quickly! Start with something small, before committing to five new evening events on your schedule!

The point here is not to add more stress to your life, it’s to add more fun and greater fulfilment! And when you do take on one of these ideas above, chances are you’ll be more engaged in ALL areas of your life. 

So spend some time brainstorming what you may like to take on this weekend. It could be as simple as planning a night out bowling! And then GET IT ON YOUR CALENDAR!

Let me know what you choose to take on, and how it goes! Leave me a comment below.

Not sure where to start? Perhaps it’s been so long since you’ve thought about your hobbies you’ve forgotten what they are? I’m happy to gift you my ‘Spark Your G.E.N.I.U.S.’ workbook ~ it will be sure to get the wheels turning! Message me HERE. 

 

Have a FAB week!

 

Is it your time… for Mobile Heaven?

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My Week in Pics: From tapas to paella… and maximising the moments without a mobile phone.

Is it your time… for Mobile Heaven?

Happy Friday!

It’s funny. I’m old enough to know what life was like before cell phones existed. And somehow the world survived just fine!

And now, if anything happens to our phones, it’s like our world comes crashing down. And I’ll admit it, I’m no exception.

It’s been tough not having a properly working phone this past week. However as much as I value technology, the internet, and social media for all it can offer in terms of connection and relationship-building, I also think there may be a downside, too.

Watch this week’s video to hear about my latest mobile phone woes, and the challenge I’ve created as a result!

 

When you are experiencing something, checking something off of your bucket list (and trust me, I’m the Queen of Bucket List!), or engaging in your daily activities, are you actually experiencing? And what if you couldn’t post to social media, could you survive?

I invite you to take on this disconnection challenge… and find the joy in the action of DOING.

DO IT… and then share your experiences in the comments below. I dare you!

Have a FAB week!

 

 

How to Remember People’s Names in 7 Fool-Proof Steps!

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My Week in Pics: Working hard at some of the cute neighbourhood cafes, enjoying farewell brunches, gelato, and local cuisine, watching Vivaldi being performed at the ancient Klementinum, camping for a night at Melt Festival in Germany (and swimming in the lake with Pippi Longstocking!), completing a Prague Outdoor Escape, visiting Little Hanoi, and going to a beer spa!!! 

 

How to Remember People’s Names in 7 Fool-Proof Steps!

Happy Friday!

And greetings no longer from Prague, but rather my beautiful home town in Oakville (which has actually exceeded the population for a town, and so is technically now a city. Yet everyone still refers to it as at own because, well, it sounds more quaint!) Random Friday fact for you!

I flew back across the pond yesterday, and am excited to be en route to New Orleans, where I’m looking forward to presenting at the International Association of Administrative Professionals (iaap) annual Summit.

I have to say I love attending and participating in conferences and summits. I love the energy, I love the learning, and I love the meeting of a whole lotta new people.

And ideally, I love going beyond simply meeting them to actually connecting with them.

In last week’s post, I shared some ideas and easy to implement strategies that help to build instant and lasting connection. One of them was asking, and remembering, people’s names. And I promised to go deeper into this strategy this week.

So, that is exactly what we’re going to do today! Watch today’s video to learn the 7 easy, fool-proof steps to remembering people’s names. 

***WARNING!*** After you watch this video you’ll no longer be able to use the excuse “I’m useless at remembering names!” because now you’ll have the steps… And once you learn something, you can’t unlearn it. 

Once again, the steps are:

  1. Present
  2. Listen
  3. Association
  4. Impression
  5. Scribe
  6. Interest
  7. Repetition 

Are you ready to put these techniques into practice?!? I hope so! And I want to hear how it goes. Test it out, and then share your experiences in the comments below, or on my YouTube channel. And be sure to SUBSCRIBE!

Do you know someone in your life who could benefit from this video? Sharing is caring after all, so send it on over to them!

Have a FAB week!

Carol - high res

We all need a tribe. Got yours? 3 Ways to find, or build, your tribe.

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We all need a tribe. Got yours? 3 ways to find, or build, your tribe.

Happy Friday!

Hard to believe I’ve been home for a week now… it’s almost as though I never left! To be honest, it’s kind of comforting. Nothing really changes.

And although it’s been a busy week, preparing for two exciting presentations for the Association of Public Sector Professionals and the International Association of Administrative Professionals, a Women Living Big Habitat for Humanity Build, and lots of fun fam jam and friend catch up time, I’ve loved every minute of it.

Why? Because I love being surrounded by my special peeps. I love being surrounded by amazing folks that I love and that love me. I love being surrounded by my ‘tribe.’

Human beings need human connection. We’re social creatures. And we all desire to be around people who accept us, who ‘get’ us, and who love us unconditionally no matter what.

And that’s what this week’s video it all about!

Watch it here:

 

Which of these three ideas are you going to take on this week? And why does it matter to YOU to be a part of a Tribe? Share your comments below or over at my YouTube channel! And be sure to SUBSCRIBE

AND, please feel free to share with other people in your life! 

Have a FAB week!

Carol - high res

 

 

 

 

TRANSCRIPT:

HAPPY FRIDAY! I’m Carol Schulte, and welcome to another video edition of my Happy Friday blog.

And greetings as I come to you live on location from our Women Living Big Habitat for Humanity Build.

Last week Iguazu, Argentina, this week Ontario, Canada! Yes, this jet-setter is pretty fortunate. However I have to say even more fortunate than being able to travel? Having a network, a community, a tribe I can come home to.

Although it’s been a busy week ~ preparing for my talk yesterday in Ottawa for the Association of Public Sector Information Professionals ~ and more prep for the workshop I’m delivering for the International Association of Administrative Professionals on Saturday, today’s build (not to mention some much needed fam jam and friend catch up time!) I have to say I’ve been loving every minute of it. Why? Because I’ve been surrounded be some pretty amazing peeps.

Human beings are social creatures.

And our number one desire is to belong… to something. A group, a community, a tribe.

We all want to know there are people that ‘get’ us. We want to know there are people who have our backs. We want to know there are people who will love us regardless of what we look like, what we’ve done, or what we’ve said.

Now I know I’ve written before about the importance of having a ‘Positive Peeps Posse,’ and so today I want to expand on this idea, and offer three simple strategies for you to start finding, or building, your own tribe.

  1. Surround Yourself With Like-Minded People.

As Oprah says, ‘Surround yourself only with those who life you higher.’ This may mean doing a personal audit and getting honest with yourself, and it may mean having to let some people go that are no longer serving you. Sometimes it’s more important to subtract, then to add to your current network.

  1. Put Yourself Out There.

It can be intimidating to join new groups, attend events where you may not know very many people, introduce yourself to folks you don’t yet know. And yet sometimes that’s exactly what you gotta do to find your peeps. And I truly believe in the idea: There are no such thing as strangers, only friends you haven’t met.

  1. Become a cheerleader, a raving fan, and treasure your peeps. 

Before I went on Remote Year, I had a pretty jam-packed schedule attending events and meetings left, right, and center. People used to tell me I was crazy! Perhaps I am. However I LOVE people, and I love supporting people who are going after their dreams and are up to big things. You have to first offer support, if you are also looking for support in return. And we all need it.

And, treasure those people who are already important people in your life. Reach out to them regularly, Remember not only birthdays, but also important events, milestones, anniversaries. Take the time to let those important people in your life know how much they really matter to you.

So there you have it. Surround yourself with like-minded people, put yourself out there, and become a cheerleader, a raving fan, and treasure your people.

If you have someone in your life you think would benefit from this video, please share it with them! And let’s keep the conversation going. Which idea are you going to take on this week?

Share your ideas in the comments below.

And until next time, I’m Carol Schulte coming to you live from the Women Living Big Habitat for Humanity Build, surrounded and humbled by 22 powerhouse women. And don’t forget to keep dreaming big, playing big, and living big.

Who is in YOUR tribe? And if you don’t have one yet, who is one person you’d like in yours? Perhaps you may even want to reach out to them today!

Have a FAB week!

Carol

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