Carol Schulte

Get your BRĀV on!

speaker slam

I Took On My Life This Year. Here’s What Happened…

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Happy Saturday!

I’m typing to you as I listen to the rain pouring down all around me, competing with the Christmas Carols playing in the background.

Quite apropos, as we’re grieving the loss of my bestie’s mother, a beautiful woman inside and out, an extremely talented artist, and an incredibly strong fighter. Her celebration of life was yesterday, and I wasn’t up for a Happy Friday. And so for the first time in years I’m gracing you with my presence on this wet Saturday instead! (it’s always good to switch things up every once in a while, wouldn’t you agree?!? And on another note, give an extra squeeze to your loved ones… ’tis the season after all!) 

I was so fortunate to have spent most of this week with my friends and fellow speaker colleagues at our annual convention. As per usual, it was amazeballs.

My brain may be ready to explode, but my heart is full. This association really has become my family.

I’m in the process of compiling my biggest and most relevant takeaways, which I will share next week, but I wanted to at least disclose what made it so different this year.

It wasn’t the programming, the international speakers, or the fact we were in a convention centre for the first time in London, Ontario. Nor was it the fact I spoke on the main stage, having curated and conducted a ‘Meet The Experts’ session. (although that was pretty exciting!) 

No, it wasn’t any of that.

It was me. It was how I showed up.

You see, I really took on my life this year.

And it all started when I wrote my ‘Brave List.’

Once I made a list of everything I would do ‘If I Were Braver….’everything changed.

Not only am I happy to report I’ve tackled almost everything on that list (was even vulnerable enough to share some of the big ones! If you haven’t already seen the video that’s gone viral and now been seen by over 1.5 million people across various platforms, check it out here! AND, if you’re ready to create your own Brave List, join us at our next LIVE event on Jan. 9th, 2020…!) but even more powerful is the discovery I made:

The more you share about yourself — your biggest fears, your deepest desires — the less you have to hide.

And it’s pretty darn freeing.

One of the bravest things I took on this year, as luck would have it, happened to fall on the same day as a big speaking event I had the honour of participating in.

Well, I’ve been sitting on the video from that talk for a few weeks now… and this week I finally watched it. And then I shared it with a few trusted folks. And now it’s time to get my own brave on and share it with you.

So this Happy Saturday, following the theme of spicing things up, is going to fall in the form of a video.

I hope you enjoy!

I’m going to leave you with two questions:

1. What are you afraid of? 

2. If you were to look closely enough, what would you find underneath your greatest fear?

 

I hope you choose brave this upcoming year.

Brave enough to embrace your deepest fears, so as to expose your greatest desires. 

Brave enough to take on your life.

Brave enough to be YOU. 

 

And now I want to hear ONE IDEA you’re ready to bravely take on in the comments below! I want to make sure I can be there cheering 🙌 you on!

 

Have a FAB week!

P.S. It’s time for a Brave New Year, and a Brave New YOU. Wouldn’t you agree?!? Come join us at our LIVE EVENT on Jan 9th, where we’ll create our own ‘If I Were Braver’ list, and get busy crafting a Brave 2020 vision, complete with a Brave Action Plan!

(psssst… girlfriend rates available early bird tickets on until THIS MONDAY, Dec. 20th… so get your brave on NOW! 🤣)

I Never Thought I’d Be Here.

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these photos were taken less than 9 hours apart… 

Happy Friday!

Yes, it’s been a big week.

And instead of explaining why and how and what all happened, I’m going to get my own brave on and simply share the script I wrote the day before going on stage at Grand Slam… it kinda of explains it all.

(Warning: I’m gonna get pretty darn vulnerable here…!!!)

I Never Thought I’d Be Here.

 

What are you afraid of?

When I was in theatre school, they had us do this exercise where we had to trigger our deepest fear in order to evoke emotion and tears.The idea being we’d learn to cry at the drop of a hat.

And mine was always the same. Ever since I was little, my deepest fear was losing my Mum.

See, my Mum was my person. She saw me, she got me.

And then she got sick.

Like, really sick.
Like, lose your hair from chemo sick.
Like, skeleton sick.

And then, my deepest fear became my reality.

I lost My Mum.

And then I lost me.

And so, I went on a mad search to find me again.

I checked in Chiang Mai, volunteering at an orphanage for HIV babies and children.
I combed through Calcutta, spending time at Mother Teresa’s Home for The Dying.
I rummaged around Rishikesh, living in an Ashram to study intense yoga and meditation.

I shaved my head for breast cancer research.

I spend 3 months picking apples in New Zealand. (…I may have met a man, and moved into his van!)

But was I being brave?
No.

I was running, I was hiding, I was escaping.
I wasn’t conquering ANYTHING.

As long as we’re trying to conquer our fear, it’s actually our fear that’s conquering us. 

I’ve come to discover our fears are like the whac-a-mole game I used to play at Chuck e Cheese… as soon as you smash one down, another one pops on up.

And that’s what happened to me.

My fear of losing my Mum, losing the one person who got me, came true.
But I never conquered it.

Instead, it became my fear of never being able to become a Mom myself – to be that that person for my child one day the way she was for me.

And that’s when I discovered something fascinating about fear.

When you flip it over, if you look carefully enough, what you find is desire.
And the deeper the fear, the greater the desire.

Which brings me to my next question:

Have you ever given yourself a subcutaneous injection?!? It’s when you pinch your skin, and you plunge a 1.5-inch needle all the way in, and then slowly squeeze the syringe until there’s no liquid left.

I did this to myself for the first time on Nov. 9th.

It was not fun.

And over the past 11 days, I’ve done it 24 more times, injecting 5 different types of drugs into my belly and upper thighs, popped a whole bunch of pills, and rubbed hormonal gel onto my shoulders every night before bed.

For one reason only.

I want babies.
And I don’t have any.
And I’m single.
And I’m 38.

Which means it’s egg freezing time!
Which starts with egg harvesting.
Which happens when they say go time.

And so, at 10:30 this morning, I was in a hospital gown, knocked out under twilight anaesthetic, for retrieval surgery. (And you know what’s kind of crazy, I still don’t totally know what went down in there… but it involved the longest needle I’ve ever seen in my entire life, a whole lotta pain and discomfort, and them sucking up all of the liquid from each of my follicles, hoping to find some treasure inside.)

And now, after 5 months of no coffee, no alcohol, no highlighting of my hair, no doing of my nails, I’m happy to report I have 9 tiny eggs, comfortably chilling in a freezer down the street.

I never thought I’d be here.

I could’ve spent so much time and energy trying to ‘conquer’ my fear… but that would have been futile.

Because they’re not going anywhere.

So instead of being ashamed of fear, afraid of fear… be brave enough to feel it, to face it, to embrace it… and then to expose it.

Because only then will you see your fears and desires are actually two sides of the same coin.

And it’s far more powerful to be pulled by your desires than be paralysed by your fears.

So I could be the person have been sitting in that sterile waiting room, avoiding eye contact with anyone at all costs, or I can take selfies with the nurses at the clinic (and I have some great ones, let me tell you) I can shamelessly ask you to send any cute, kind, eligible bachelors my way, and I can bravely stand here totally crampy, totally bloated, and totally exposed.

And I am.

Because when I look at my deepest fears, all I now see are my greatest desires.

And the same it possible for you.

So, what are you afraid of?

THANK YOU.

 

And so now I ask you… what are you afraid of? And will you be able to look close enough to see what lies underneath that fear is actually what you desire? I look forward to hearing from you in the comments below.

It’s time to push past the procrastination and self-sabotage.

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Happy Friday!

I’m going to get real with you today… it’s been one of those days, one of those weeks! 

I mean, it’s lots of good stuff ~ some very exciting things happening, some very unexpected things happening ~ but as a result I’ve been running around like a bit of a crazy chicken and can’t quite seem to catch my breath!

I just got off of a call with my ADHD coach (yup, I said it! I was formally diagnosed by a psychiatrist 10 months ago now… although not sure how open with you I’ve been about it all?!? Well I have it, and can certainly see how it manifests in my life… and so I’m now working with a coach to implement strategies to help make up for my lack of executive functioning capabilities!) And he challenged me to take a different approach to this week’s Happy Friday. It’s after 6pm on Friday, and I was challenged to be complete by 7pm, so I could make time for my first proper meal of the day, and have a relaxing evening. 

SO, I’m taking that one, and going to simply share what I posted this morning on facebook, which explains a bit about where I’m at!

“So the Facebook prompt is always: What’s On Your Mind?

Well, glad you asked! Here’s what is currently on my mind…

I haven’t been sleeping well this week! I’m waking up way before my alarm – like 5am or 6am – which is ridiculously early for me. (Now I know for many of you this may be normal – but not this girl! I’m a natural night owl… anytime before midnight and I’m winning 🤣!)

Why? I’m both totally excited AND totally anxious…

😃 I’m excited because I have the honour of now being one of the speakers competing in the Grand Slam!

😳 I’m anxious because I have the honour of now being one of the speakers competing in the Grand Slam! (and… because I was a last minute addition after one of the participants had to withdraw from the event, and chose me to replace him, I haven’t even finished writing my speech!)

 

😃 I’m excited because I have an opportunity to inspire and impact 600 people at the event – and maybe even more beyond.

😳 I’m anxious because I have an opportunity to inspire and impact 600 people at the event – and maybe even more beyond.

 

😃 I’m excited because there are some incredible prizes at stake… I mean speaking on the Archangel Stage next year?!? WHAT?!? And being on Goal Cast? Yes please! And those are only a few…

😳 I’m anxious because there are some incredible prizes at stake… I mean speaking on the Archangel Stage next year?!? WHAT?!? And being on Goal Cast? Yes please! And those are only a few…

 

😃 I’m excited because I get to share the stage with some incredibly inspiring people.

😘 I’m anxious because I get to share the stage with (and therefore compete against) some incredibly inspiring people.

and I could go on…

Now it makes sense physiologically… excitement and anxiety actually produce the same reactions in the brain and the body – they are both aroused emotions. (look up “anxious reappraisal” if you wanna learn how to turn the latter into the former… and check out this past blog post where I write all about it)

But how it’s manifesting for me right now, is procrastinating on writing the darn speech in the first place… which isn’t helping!

Here’s the thing. If you’re a procrastinator like me, it doesn’t mean you’re lazy. Or don’t care. Quite the opposite, in fact. It’s when I care a LOT, and want it be amazing, to be perfect, that I put it off… OR, I self sabotage. I don’t give myself enough time to properly prepare, to give it my all, so I have an ‘out’ just in case.

Well, perfect doesn’t exist. And it only has an opportunity to be amazing if I actually write the thing!

Let’s push through our excitement and anxiety and procrastination and self-sabotage together.

Whatever that thing is for you – let’s GET HER DONE! I could use the accountability… 🙏!

So, wish me luck. And know that I am cheering you on, too! 🙌

(Oh, and if you wanna come out and support all of these incredible speakers for the Grand Slam next Wednesday, you are TOTALLY invited! Grab your ticket 🎫 before they’re all gone! It’s gonna be an AWESOME and inspiring evening… AND I HAVE A FEW SEATS LEFT IN A DESIGNATED SECTION (Carol’s cheering squad?!? HA! And a HUGE thanks to all of my special peeps who are already in… means more than you know! So message me if you want one!!! 😉)

 

So, there you have it. Can you relate? Have you ever experienced excitement and anxiety at the same time? Or procrastination and self-sabotage? Or perhaps like me, all at the same time? If so, CONGRATS! You are HUMAN! I’d love to hear what resonated with you, and how you’re going to get your brave on with respect to pushing through whatever that ‘thing’ for you is this week!

I look forward to hearing from you in the comments below!

Have a FAB week!

P.S. Here is the link to grab your ticket to Grand Slam! (OR reply to this email, as I may still have 1 or 2 left in my reserved section!)

P.P.S. Are you ready to GET YOUR BRĀV ON?!? Come and join us at Pursuit OCR on Nov 28th where you’ll learn what it means to get in your B.R.A.V.E. Zone, and then we’ll put it into practice in the 30,000 sqft of awesomeness at this indoor playground!